The sweet sorrow

One partner’s job required her to travel frequently.  Her mate always made a point of driving her to the airport, parking the car, and going to security checkpoint with her.  The ritual involved waited until she walked through security, and down the jet way until she couldn’t be seen anymore before leaving.  That time together was always special to both of them and they missed it sorely when it wasn’t possible. 

On the other end, a returning ritual was to greet the other with a handmade sign that changed every time, and a couple bottles of beer.  When they were home, they’d enjoy the bottles together, and one another’s company.



  • Have a little mini-ritual right when the final parting takes place.  These varied from long hugs and slow kisses, to humming a song softly together, to writing words on each other’s backs while hugging.
  • Texting or calling right before the plane is about to takeoff.
  • A parting ritual at the place of parting, which might be in the home, place of work, . . .
  • Taking a full minute to look in one another’s eyes without saying anything.
  • Stopping on the way at a favorite haunt, such as a coffee shop, a park for a little walk, a bite to eat, . . .
  • Playing a song together during the last moments together.


Principal Purposes Served

  • Create stable touchstones
  • Build the relationship culture and history
  • Emotional money in the bank
  • Foster nurturing, affectionate, loving contact